Ever since I saw my brother in his green cap and gown during my freshman year, I’ve always pictured when that moment would finally come for me.

A student would announce my name as I tried not to fall while walking across the stage in wedges. I would look over at my fellow classmates in the audience and accept my diploma. I would finally say that after four years of late nights and copious amounts of coffee, “I did it.”

Simply put, the coronavirus had other plans.

Graduation has been pushed back to the summer or virtual for many seniors across the country, and for Pascack Valley’s Class of 2020, these ideas might be a possibility. Day by day, I’m on edge of what could happen next and only hope to see my teachers and classmates again. 

Now, senior traditions like commitment day, prom, and class trips are not the same. Even something as small as a college tour has been off the table, making it difficult for many seniors to confidently make a decision before their deposit was due by May 1.

Our first semester of college is even up in the air. The list can go on and on.

And it is not only my future that is unpredictable, but the present. The high school experience has been replaced with blurred days of virtual learning, watching movies and television shows, and adapting to this new normal. I went from having too many assignments and tasks to almost none at all. 

In the midst of this, it is also an unfortunate way to say goodbye to Smoke Signal as I head off to college. Despite us still producing content virtually, I did not expect to never be able to cover events in the building ever again. As for One Spirit, despite us meeting virtually, we are unable to host our next events.

I’m also lucky enough to have been able to travel abroad to Paris, London, and Normandy last school year, having the opportunity to learn about history outside of the classroom. Even travelling this year to Washington, D.C. for the National High School Journalism Convention would not have been possible if it was scheduled for these final months.

While I am entertained by quarantine-related TikToks and Spotify playlists, the virus still feels surreal, especially after it has already robbed the rest of my senior year — and I expect to feel like this for a while. Although these precautions were needed to slow the spread of the virus, it is difficult to not feel upset about having little time to say goodbye to my classmates and teachers.

But I’m not here to complain. 

Despite these next few months filled with uncertainty, I know one thing for sure: I can make the best of this situation. My senior year does not come before those who lost their lives as the virus continues to spread — and who knows when it will end.

Instead of guessing what lies ahead, I have to adapt to reality, as health professionals, grocery store employees, social workers, and janitors are on the frontlines fighting against this virus. While they are fighting to keep me safe, the coronavirus has hit them harder than others who contract the disease, according to an article from CNN.

We are all affected by this pandemic and need to offer support to one another. “Social distancing” does not mean to stop being social — I can still reach out to others through phone calls and on social media as a substitute for face-to-face contact. During this time, I have had the opportunity to grow even closer to my friends and spend more time with family.

I can also finally take a breath. Without hours of school per week, mountains of homework, and extracurricular activities, I have time to pick up hobbies and try new things. This has been a pause to truly appreciate everything in front of me.

And the more I do my part and stay home, the faster it will take for life to return to normal.

I know administrators, faculty members, and parents are trying to make the best of this situation and find unique ways to honor our accomplishments these past four years, such as surprising us with lawn signs and lighting up the football field every Friday. Graduating high school will truly be a moment to remember.

We are the Class of 2020. Do not give up hope.